‘Caitlyn is bossy. She likes to direct other children during playtime’.
The teacher delivered the message with some caution. I guess she was not sure how we would react.
She had nothing to be worried about because I was okay with it.
The teacher acknowledged that she does not have a concern with it. We need to remind about Caitlyn boundaries, and explain when it is okay and when it isnot okay. You know, be a decent human being and respect others. I am cool with that.
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I do want to get too caught up in semantics, like the message in the ‘ban bossy campaign’. I do not personally think of the word ‘bossy’ as derogatory.
When I hear a girl or boy referred to as ‘bossy,’ I think ‘Leader’ and ‘Confident’.
[bctt tweet=”My Daughter is ‘Bossy’, Here is Why I Am More Than Okay With It” username=”cherralle_”]
Here are 5 Reasons Why I am Okay with My Daughter Being Bossy
1. You say bossy, I say Leadership
I see it as the little one displaying early leadership skills. Heaven knows, that after going through terrible two’s; tiresome three’s; and ferocious fours – all of this ‘attitude’ has to amount to something!
2. Stand up for herself and others
I want my daughter to be able to stand up for herself.
For her to be brave and stand up for yourself and others.
In fact, her last year’s teacher wrote in her report card ‘Caitlyn stands up for her friends.’ That was the best teacher FEEDBACK EVER! I was proud of her.

3. Be Confident and Proud
Caitlyn has BIG hair. She told me that one of her friends laughed at her hair. So was teaching her a comeback. ‘Everyone’s hair is different and my hair is beautiful because my mother said so.’
Mic drop.
I never know how to deal with these type of situations. I always think, what can I say that reminds her to be strong and proud. And then I come I up with these gems.
Afterward, I look at myself in the mirror.
Shaking my head, reflecting on my pop psychology brand of parenting. Where is the PARENTING HOW TO GUIDE when you need one?
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4. Independence
Caitlyn is very hesitant in new situations, I wrote here about why you should not call my daughter shy. However, when she warms up, she can be something else.
By growing comfortable in the situation, she also learns to engage in her surroundings without much assistance (on her own terms).
At one party she took over one hour to get comfortable.
As we were about to leave she transformed into a ‘Woohooo girl’. Jumps in and out of the pool (I was panicking of course).
Ultimately, she is developing her unique brand of confidence. Simply put ‘let me be, I will let you know when I am ready.’
5, Ask
I hope my daughter feels confident enough to always ask questions. One of the things that hold us all back in any situation is being hesitant to ASK the question. Well, if being bossy gets her to ask the question, then I am behind it.
Putting her hand up in class to ask a question. Speaking up whenever something needs to be said.
Trust me she has never had any issues steering me to the Spiderman clothes when I am standing in the Barbie aisle.
So, I think we are covered.
In conclusion – Let girls and boys be bossy (and whatever else they need to be)
The point, I am making is this: Let girls and boys be bossy! Embrace it and encourage it. The world needs independent thinkers and doers.
Allow each child an opportunity to develop their voice. And respect others while they are doing it of course.
[bctt tweet=”The point I am making is this: Let girls and boys be bossy! Embrace it and encourage it. The world needs independent thinkers and doers” via=”no”]
I be that bossy girl ☺ I love this sooooooo much
Thank you Natasha! Indeed you are 🙂
My daughter’s teacher said exactly the same thing and we had the exact same conversation. I am proud of her “leadership skills”, but both teacher and I also remind her to give others a turn, and because she is such a people person, that works. Good on us for raising kick ass girls! <3
We need more women like you and your daughter in this world. We need good leaders and your daughter has a very bright future! She is very lucky because she have a supporting mom like you are.
Thank you Erika for your kind words
I couldn’t agree more! When I was 5 years old, my teachers called my mom into the school, sat her down, and said “Hallie is very bossy.” My mom didn’t have a problem with it; she helped me turn it into something that I could be proud of. I think being a “bossy” child helped me to become a stronger, more independent, successful adult. Your daughter is going places!
Thank you for sharing your experience! I think it’s great that your mom saw your positive.