When we had our first child, we were delighted to start our little family that we always wanted. In our plans, we always knew we will be only having two children. We did not want our daughter to grow up without a sibling, and be ‘alone.’ Both my husband I come from big families, I have four brothers and sisters and he has three brothers. So we wanted to have two kids (at least).
Now that we have our two little girls, we often get asked: ‘are you trying for a boy’?
No, we are not. Not a boy, not a girl or nothing. Here is why we will only be having two children and why it feels right for us. To also set the scene each family’s size is their own business, this is only my view on our family.
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7 Reasons Why I am Pretty Certain We Are Only Having Two Children
No middle child issues
We will have a youngest and eldest, that is it. No middle child issues. I don’t know if birth order has that much effect on a child’s life, but still it is not an issue for us. Each child will have her crown of glory, one as the eldest and one as the ‘baby’ of the family.
[bctt tweet=”We will only be having two children, the balance feels just right for us. ” username=”cherralle_”]
Divide and conquer
When we are home or going out, we divide and conquer, or ‘each one takes one.‘ I take a child, and my husband takes a child, and we are sorted. With three, what must happen? We have a ‘delicate’ balance at this point, and it is getting better the older they are getting.
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Money: School fees and they do need to eat
Raising children is an expensive exercise. With the rising cost of living and the challenges in our education system in SA, we are okay with only having two children. We aim to live as responsibly as we can, and we manage. We are both hard working parents and we want to be able to enjoy our lifestyle.
The car situation
The car only takes two car seats, so I don’t know what must happen with a third child. I do not see us getting a bigger car to accommodate three children. I am sure families do manage fine, but we are okay with only having two children.
Family of four just feels right
With four, we feel very balanced out. It can be two against two in any family scenario. My husband will probably say it’s not balanced as its three girls and him!
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The needs of our children are becoming similar
Ava is turning one and Caitlyn is four years old. We are noticing now that things are becoming a bit easier as our routines as a family settles in. What I mean by this is that the chaos is calming down, maybe a different type of chaos is to come?
They both go to sleep now within one hour of each other and wake up at roughly the same time. They share a room (when Caitlyn is not in our bed 🙂 ), and Ava is enjoying more ‘regular’ food now. To reach this point and to revert to caring for an infant, I cannot see that in the cards right now.
Happy and sad, that babyhood is almost done for us!
Our little one is turning one in a less than a month.
That is the last of babyhood for us. Ava is such a cuddly and lovable baby, and it will be our last experience of having a baby. I am also looking forward to us being able to do different things as the girls are growing up. We will be done with nappies, sleep routines, carrying a baby bag around, all that jazz.
Right now, I am very comfortable and happy with our family of four. I feel that things are finally starting to settle down in our home as the girls are growing older. This is why we are only have two children!
What about you? Are you done having children or are you planning to grow your brood 🙂
As it stands now I’m not thinking if another one. My boy needs to be a baby for a while still.
Yes he is still very little 🙂 Enjoy the baby stage with your son. It looks like you have really taken to motherhood!
I’m done at two kids. I keep telling my husband this and he says he wants more. I’m done for the exact same reasons. My number one being cost! Kids are expensive! I’d rather focus on giving the two I have the best of everything now than have more kids and have to stretch the money too thin. I’m so done.
I am also there, rather give the two I have the best I can. thank you for commenting!
We have three, one from a previous marriage, a 4 yr old and one due in the next month. Two is good for this momma. We only get the third part time. Good post and valid reasons!
I enjoyed reading your blog and can totally relate! I have four sons and people would always ask when are we having a girl as if my uterus did not put in werk already! I wrote a blog post on it also! Check it out when you get a chance! Powerupparent.com
We just have one right now and are hoping for a second and then we will see if we still want a third! Love these points though!
We ate definitely done at 2 kids. No more. Not a chance!
Not a chance LOL 🙂 You have decided!
My hands are full with the two we’ve got, but I’ve always pictured us with three children. I love that you’ve put so much thought into it. Maybe two is the magic number!
I have one and I don’t want him to be alone either. I think two is perfectly fine. A family of four is great. And have you noticed most ‘packages’ are for a family of four. Like tickets to certain places and things like that lol. Great post
I realise when you know you’re done…you just know. 3 was always the number for me… My husband just wanted kids, as many as we could have. lol. There was no end in sight for his number.
I know we’re done (had my tubes tied and all)….but when you’re done, there really should be NO need to explain choices to other people. People are such opinionated apple-holes……
Great post 🙂
I really loved this post! It is all about what works for each family! I love having one child and we both agree that our family is done. Of course people can’t stop telling us that our son NEEDS a sibling so he’s not “alone” 😛 but I come from a big family and I grew up feeling very alone with three brothers so there’s no real guarantee. I think everyone needs to do what works for them! Great post!
I have two boys and I so related to this!
You guys are adorable! Love these ideas!
Thank you!
I’m not sure if I’m done yet, we have an almost two year old.But I feel like I can only handle her, for now, and she’s still a baby 🙂